Battle Royale
by TheHineyGods
Summary: [ complete ] Characters from Inuyasha, Kenshin, Trigun, and YYH are taken and forced to fight in a strange battle royale.
1. Arrivals

Note: This fic was written and posted a helluva long time ago, under my (Kristen's) name. I deleted all of the fics on my name, though, and Becky and I decided to post this on here, since we still feel a strange attachment to this fic (not to mention the hysterical image of Kuwabara's house). And, yes, this fic is a self-insertation and is written in play form, but we still think it's as funny as hell. Read if you like.  
  
  
  
!!!!!! I R PinkCake's Disclaimer !!!!!!! -- Don't own squat... 'cept me... and that's only 'cause I paid the devil loads of money to free me again. I co-wrote this with Kris.. So, don't even give her all the credit!! And the concept came from my demented little mind, no matter what she likes to think!! Oh, and if you don't like crossovers, you might want to leave now... characters from four shows (Trigun, Inuyasha, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Rurouni Kenshin) end up in present-day AMERICA!! I'm sorry for my endless rambling... here's Kris's disclaimer...  
  
Youkai Kris's Disclaimer- ...I don't own anything, ok? Not even my own soul. -points to Becky, who is waving the "legal rights" papers in the air- ;-; Just read and review  
  
Characters that Kris wrote dialogue for:Kris(duh), Vash, Sesshoumaru, Hojo, Hiei, Yusuke, and Kenshin.  
  
Characters that Becky wrote dialogue for: Becky(duh, once again), Wolfwood, Inuyasha, Naraku, Kurama, Kuwabara, and Sano.   
  
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*Our story begins with our... heroines *cough* yeah, right... *cough* in their attic, adjusting their newly found "time portal."*  
  
Kris: -is peering into the wires behind the button-panel-thingy, poking one with a screwdriver- Hmm...I think it's done.  
  
Kris: -is electricuted- x__x  
  
Becky: -is leaning annoyingly over Kris's shoulder- Done yet? Done yet? Done yet?  
  
Kris: -coughs- YES, DARN IT!  
  
Becky: -backs up, jumping up and down- Can we leave now?!  
  
Kris: Ok, ok... -fixes the panel and punches at a few buttons-  
  
Becky: -runs forward at the portal- Can I jump in?  
  
Kris: YES! -runs over-  
  
Becky: -jumps in- Wait... where are we goooooooooooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggg?!  
  
Kris: -jumps in also- To get our first two guys!  
  
Kris: -lands somewhere- o__O; -sits in the sand- ...Well, we're here. You have your bait? 'Cause I have mine. -holds up a donut-  
  
Becky: -stares at the donut, mouth watering- Donut....  
  
Kris: -puts it back into pocket- Not for you! That's for Vash...  
  
Kris: Do you have the cigarettes for Wolfwood? We DO need some kind of bribe, you know.  
  
Becky: -holds up pack of cigarettes, throws them on the ground, stomps on them, and picks them up- Perfect...  
  
Kris: Ok, let's go find the-- -is cut off when a broom-haired guy runs past, waving his gun in the air, followed by another guy with a big cross-thing- Nevermind...AFTER THEM!!  
  
Kris: -runs and tackles Vash from behind-  
  
Becky: -runs happily after Wolfwood and Vash-   
  
Becky: -stops and looks up at Wolfwood- Yo. Word up dawg. Want a cigarette?  
  
Vash: GET IT OFF ME!!!  
  
Becky: -grabs Kris and pulls her up-  
  
Kris: SHUT UP!! -hits Vash over the head-   
  
Vash: x__x  
  
Kris: -coughs and regains her composure-  
  
Wolfwood: -looks on, amused-  
  
Vash: -curled up on the ground- Who ARE you people?!  
  
Becky: -moves in next to Wolfwood- We're the freaks that came to get you from another planet...  
  
Vash: -whimpers- ...Why...?  
  
Becky: -looks over to Vash- To make you mud wrestle with other smokin' guys from other periods in   
  
time...  
  
Vash: -sits up- And where's the point in that?  
  
Kris: I'll give you donuts if you come, ok?  
  
Vash: o__o;; Ok!  
  
Wolfwood: -looks on- Oh boy... I can see the fun coming all ready...  
  
Kris: -cackles- Let's go get everyone else!  
  
Becky: -grabs Wolfwood and drags him with her, giving him the stomped cigarettes-  
  
Kris: -drags Vash along-  
  
Becky: -stops and looks around- Wait... where's the…  
  
Kris: -pulls out a purple fork from her pocket and sticks in into the ground-  
  
Becky: -stares-  
  
::A portal back to the attic opens::   
  
Kris: -shrugs- Fork travel.  
  
Becky: It all makes sense now...  
  
Becky: -throws Wolfwood in and jumps in after him-  
  
Kris: -jumps through the portal, bringing Vash-  
  
Kris: -drops Vash on the floor- Ok, now for Inuyasha and Co.  
  
Vash: ;-; That hurt!!  
  
Becky: -drops Wolfwood and puts up a sign reading "No smoking in attic"-  
  
Becky: We don't know what affect it may have on our time portal thingy...  
  
Kris: -walks over to the panel and presses some buttons- Ok...ready!  
  
Kris: -walks back over to the center and waits-  
  
Becky: -lunges at the portal-   
  
Kris: -follows-  
  
Kris: -lands on solid ground and blinks-  
  
Kris: -a glowing whip barely misses her head- o__o;;  
  
Becky: -looks sideways-  
  
Kris: That'd be...Sesshoumaru, ne?  
  
Becky: Heh... pretty hair... -drools-  
  
Kris: Hey, he's mine... go find your guys, and I'll get mine.  
  
Becky: -gets up- Ok... ok... -spots Jaken- He he he... -steals Jaken's stick, running away with it-  
  
Kris: -stands up and approaches Sesshoumaru, who is currently fighting Inuyasha- Err... -pokes him   
  
on the shoulder- May I have a word?  
  
Sesshoumaru: -turns to look at Kris- Oh, all right…  
  
Sesshoumaru: -stops his assault and turns to Kris- What do you want?  
  
Kris: I'm conducting a survey, and....ok, nevermind the act. I need you to come to my time and fight   
  
with a bunch of guys for my sister and I's own entertainment. Got that?  
  
Sesshoumaru: ...And what do I get out of it?  
  
Kris: ...If Inuyasha gets beaten, you can have the Tetsusaiga.   
  
Sesshoumaru: Done!  
  
Inuyasha: O_____o;;  
  
Becky: -turns around and realizes Inuyasha is standing right by Sesshoumaru- Grrr... "Go find them" she says...   
  
Becky: -stomps back and stands in front of Inuyasha- And if you win, Sesshoumaru's gone and you don't have to deal with him anymore...  
  
Kris: Ok, now to get Hobo..  
  
Inuyasha: -looks at Kris- Ha ha ha... Hobo's coming?!  
  
Kris: Yeah, and y'all can beat up on him.  
  
Inuyasha: At least something good will come of this.  
  
Kris: -scuttles off with Sesshy to find Hojo-  
  
Sesshoumaru: -follows Kris as they look for Hojo- ...Is that him? -points to a lost-looking teenaged boy nearby-  
  
Kris: -nods- Ooooh yeah... -runs over to him- Hi, I need you to come with me, or Kagome might have a little "accident" with my friend here... -points to Sesshoumaru, who rasies an eyebrow-  
  
Sesshoumaru: Err...rawr.   
  
Hojo: -gasps- NUU!! I'll go, I'll go!!  
  
Kris: ^__^ Ok, let's go wait for Becky! -goes back to where they started and waits-  
  
*Off in some other direction*   
  
Becky: -pulls Inuyasha away by the ear- TO NARAKU!!  
  
Inuyasha: Grrr…  
  
Becky: Sniff him out... the quicker we find him, the quicker you can get back here...  
  
Inuyasha: Fine... I'm sniffing....  
  
Inuyasha: -poins to a tree- He's up there...  
  
*back in the clearing*  
  
Hojo: -stands, shooting nervous glances at Sesshoumaru, who looks like he's on the verge of falling asleep-  
  
Kris: Total slaughter...total slaughter. I won't leave..a single man...alive.  
  
Kris: La di la di die, genocide...la di la di dud, an ocean of blood. Let's begin...the killing tiiiiiime...  
  
Sesshoumaru: -runs his fingers through his hair, humming- I feel pretty...oh so pretty...  
  
Kris: O__o; -glances at Sesshoumaru-  
  
Sesshoumaru: Who's that girl in the mirror there? -in a deeper voice- What mirror, where?  
  
Sesshoumaru: -continues to sing-  
  
*At Naraku's tree*  
  
Becky: -looks up, spotting a big white "babboon"-   
  
Naraku: -jumps down from the tree- Kukukuku... who are you?  
  
Becky: It doesn't matter. I have a dead person that wants to be your new friend... back at my place. Now let's go…  
  
Becky: -walks back to clearing, followed by Inuyasha and Naraku- Ready to go?  
  
Kris: -nods- Yes, please... -glances to the singing Sesshoumaru and cringes-  
  
Becky: -looks at Sesshoumaru- Now that's scary...  
  
Becky: So... where's the fork?  
  
Kris: -sticks the fork into the ground and jumps through the forming portal, dragging Hojo along-  
  
Sesshoumaru: -follows-  
  
Becky: -pulls Inuyasha in, followed by a "Kuku"ing Naraku-  
  
Kris: -touches down in the attic to find Vash in the corner, eating the donut- o___o;; MY DONUT!! -runs at him, attempting to steal the donut back-  
  
Vash: -struggles to keep the donut from Kris's grasp- MINE!!  
  
Becky: -lands in attic, next to Kris and Hojo-  
  
Sesshoumaru: ...This place looks familiar…  
  
Becky: -turns to Sesshoumaru with a hypnotizing clock thingy- No... this place doesn't looks familiar at allllllll....  
  
Sesshoumaru: -blinks and looks around- Are you sure?  
  
Becky: -hits Sesshoumaru over the head with Jaken's stick- POSITIVE!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: @__@ Look...shampoo bottles..  
  
Sesshoumaru: -falls over-  
  
Wolfwood: -stands in the corner, smoking-   
  
Becky: -hold up "no smoking" sign and motions toward the door-  
  
Wolfwood: -walks out to continue smoking his weird cigarettes-  
  
Becky: So, where to next?  
  
Kris: The Meiji Era!!  
  
Becky: -drools- Zanza... Zanza... Zanza  
  
Kris: Ok..ok...we'll get Zanza...let's go.  
  
Becky: -watches as Kris pushes buttons-  
  
Becky: -leaps through portal-  
  
Kris: -pushes buttons and gives the petrified Hojo a sideways glance-  
  
Kris: -follows Becky-  
  
Becky: -lands in the river-  
  
Becky: O___o  
  
Kris: -lands on the riverbank-   
  
Kris: -looks up to see Kenshin and Sano standing nearby- ^__^ Perfect!  
  
Becky: -looks up- Ahhhhhhh!!! Zanza!!  
  
Kris: .___. -screams to Sano- RUUUUUUUUUN!!!  
  
Sano: -looks into the river- O___o  
  
Kenshin: -blinks-  
  
Sano: -looks at Kris- Why?  
  
Kris: -points at the Becky in the water- She wants to do the nasty with you!!!!!!  
  
Becky: -sneaks up behind Sano and jumps on his back-  
  
Sano: O___O AHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Kris: NUUUU!!! I was too laaaaaaateee!!  
  
Sano: -runs in circles with Becky on his back-  
  
Kris: -walks over to a very confused Kenshin and cries on his shoulder-  
  
Kenshin: o___O ...  
  
Becky: -jumps off of Sano's back and regains composure-  
  
Becky: -grabs Sano's hand and shakes it- Hello... I'm Becky, princess of the future and all beings in it...  
  
Kris: -looks up from Kenshin's yukata- Is...it over?  
  
Kenshin: ...Err...  
  
Becky: .. and I wanted you and your friend here -points to Kenshin- to come to the future and fight in   
  
the fight of all fights...  
  
Kenshin: But, miss princess of the future, fighting only for amusement isn't nice..  
  
Kris: -snorts- "Princess of the future"... let me handle this...  
  
Kris: -growls at Kenshin- Come with us, or I'll kill that ugly pig, Kaoru!  
  
Kenshin: o__o Ok.  
  
Becky: -grabs Sano- Heh... she's got such a way with the guys...  
  
Sano: -stares at the two of them, bewildered-  
  
Kris: Let's go, then! -sticks the fork in the ground-  
  
Becky: -jumps on Sano's back and slaps his butt- Into the portal we go!!   
  
Sano: -runs into the portal, in fear for his life-  
  
Kris: -drags Kenshin through-  
  
Becky: -lands on the floor in a tangled pile with Sano-  
  
Becky: That was fun...  
  
Sano: O___o;;  
  
Kris: -lands and looks around at the crowd in the attic-  
  
Hojo: -is trading Yu-Gi-Oh cards with Vash-   
  
Kris: O___o;;  
  
Becky: NUUUUU!!!  
  
Kris: GET THOSE THINGS OUT OF THIS ATTIC, NOW!!  
  
Becky: -grabs Yu-Gi-Oh cards and torches them-  
  
Hojo: .___. NUUU!!!  
  
Becky: -cackles evilly- Kukukukukuku!!  
  
Naraku: Hey!! That's my cackle! I should get it copyrighted...  
  
Kris: -whacks Vash- I'm ashamed of you!!  
  
Hojo: ..What about me?   
  
Kris: Eh, I expected it from you...you're an idiot.  
  
Kris: -stands up and punches something into the panel, then jumps through the portal- One more stop!  
  
Becky: Kurama... I'm coming to get you...  
  
Sano: Poor guy...  
  
Becky: -hits Sano with Jaken's stick-  
  
Sano: @___@  
  
Becky: -jumps through portal-  
  
Kris: -lands in the middle of a dance floor, bright neon lights flashing whilst people around her do disco moves-  
  
Kris: .__. Err... -sticks the fork in the ground- I'll have to fix that sometime..  
  
Becky: O____o  
  
Kris: -jumps through portal and lands in the middle of a busy street-  
  
Becky: -jumps through, landing next to Kris-  
  
Becky: -looks around- Kurama... I have a pretty little plaaaaaaaaaant for you!! -holds up half-dead   
  
cactus-  
  
Yusuke: -is on the side of the street, watching as a car comes speeding towards the two girls in the   
  
street- Hmph...it'll swerve. I'm not gonna die again.  
  
Becky: -walks off of the street and smacks Yusuke in the head-  
  
Becky: Where is Kurama?!  
  
Kris: o__o; -scuttles out of the road to the sidewalk- ...Yusuke Urameshi?  
  
Yusuke: Mm?   
  
Kris: We're having a tournament...wanna be in it?   
  
Yusuke: Sure, whatever.  
  
Becky: -in strange announcer voice- Will Yusuke gather his team in time? Who will he ask to join him?   
  
And will Becky ever find Kurama?   
  
Becky: -continues in same voice- These answers and more in the next... -in normal voice- sorry...   
  
got caught up in the moment.  
  
Kris: O__o; -turns to Yusuke- You know where Hiei is?   
  
Yusuke: -shrugs- Probably at Kurama's house...that's where he stays when he's in Ningenkai.  
  
Becky: -cackles- Kukukukukukuku... To Kurama's house we go!!  
  
Kris and Yusuke: -follow to Kurama's house-  
  
Becky: -knocks on Kurama's door-  
  
Kurama: -opens the door- Hi...   
  
Becky: HI!! -looks into Kurama's house to see Hiei glaring out at her-  
  
Becky: -glares back at Hiei- Mean little guy, eh?  
  
Hiei: What do YOU want?  
  
Becky: I want HIM!! -points at Kurama-  
  
Kurama: O____o  
  
Hiei: Go ahead, have him...then maybe people will get off my back about "being with" him...  
  
Becky: -picks up Kurama and drags him off- Thanks!!  
  
Kris: C'mon, Hiei-chan, you're coming with me! -grabs Hiei-  
  
Hiei: -growls and tries to reach for his sword, but Kris is carrying him over her shoulder- -__-  
  
Becky: -turns to looks back at Yusuke- Hey, where's Kuwabara?  
  
Yusuke: -shrugs- I'd say at his house... playing with his cat. -snickers-  
  
Becky: His cat?!  
  
Kris: Yes, Kazuma Kuwabara is known to have a soft spot for cats, and has one of his own, named   
  
Eikichi.   
  
Yusuke: o__O Are you...some kind of spy or something?  
  
Becky: No, she's just a big freak… now... somebody lead us to Kuwabara's house...  
  
Kurama: If you put me down, I can lead you...   
  
Becky: -puts Kurama down- Ok... lead!!  
  
Hiei: -has fallen asleep-  
  
Becky: -swings Jaken's stick over her shoulder, accidentally hitting Hiei in the head-  
  
Hiei: -emits a blast of Spirit Energy-  
  
Kris: -falls over- x___x  
  
Becky: Kukukuku...  
  
*back in the attic...*   
  
Naraku: Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!! She's using my laugh again... I can sense it!!   
  
Hojo: -is holding his last Yu-Gi-Oh card- *sniffle* ;-;  
  
Naraku: -falls over after being hit in the head by Sano-   
  
Wolfwood: -is still outside, smoking the last of his crooked cigarettes-  
  
Kenshin: -is sitting next to Vash, discussing peace and love-  
  
*back by the girls...*  
  
Kris: -is walking by an irate Hiei- Are we there yet??  
  
Becky: -walks way in front of Hiei - I didn't mean to hit you with the stick!! I SWEAR!!  
  
Hiei: -mumbles something-  
  
Kurama: -walks up to a little house with cats crawling all over the outside of it-  
  
Kurama: Here we are...  
  
Becky: O____o I guess he does like cats...  
  
Kris: ...  
  
Becky: -knocks on Kuwabara's door, cats falling off of the door frame-  
  
Kris: -is mobbed by kittens- AHHHHHHH!!!! -kicks at them- GET 'EM OFF ME!!  
  
Kuwabara: -opens the door, wearing an outfit made from... you guessed it, cats- Hi.....  
  
Everyone: O____O  
  
Kris: O_______O;;; That's horrible!!!  
  
Hiei: Kuwabara...even I must say that that is disgusting.  
  
Kuwabara: What?! They're still alive!! -his "outfit" begins to move and crawls right off of him, leaving   
  
him... without clothes-  
  
Becky and Kurama: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kuwabara: -turns ten shades of red before running back into his house to get real clothing-  
  
Kris: -puts hands to eyes- THE BURNING PAAAAAAIIIINNN!!  
  
Hiei: -has passed out-  
  
Becky: -ends screaming fit and turns to the rest of the group- Yusuke, why are you smiling?  
  
Yusuke: o___o; What?  
  
Becky: Nevermind...  
  
Kris: -grabs Hiei and lifts him up over her shoulder-  
  
Kurama: I'm not stepping foot inside of his house... we can wait out here for him.  
  
Becky: -"accidentally" hits Hiei in the head with Jaken's stick again-  
  
Hiei: -emits another blast of Spirit Energy, knocking Kris over again-  
  
Becky: -looks at Hiei and gulps- Sorry...  
  
Hiei: -growls and sits up-  
  
Kuwabara: -returns to see Hiei chasing Becky around his yard, throwing cats at her-  
  
Kuwabara: Not my cats!!  
  
Hiei: -chucks a cat at Becky's head, where it proceeds to gnaw-  
  
Becky: -falls to the ground, screaming- NUUUUUUUUUUUU!! Get it off!!  
  
Kurama: -sighs- Fine... -walks over and removes the rabid cat from Becky's head-  
  
Kuwabara: -faints-   
  
Becky: Big sissy...  
  
Hiei: Hit me with that stick again and I'll do more than throw cats at you...  
  
Becky: -turns to glare at Hiei- Shut up short guy!!  
  
Hiei: And look at yourself!  
  
Becky: Shut up!! I like being short!! -goes to sit in a corner to weep-  
  
Hiei: Hn.  
  
Becky: -returns- Can we go now?  
  
Kris: Ok, Beck... grab Kuwabara and let's hit the trails.  
  
Kris: -sticks the fork in the ground-  
  
Becky: -tosses Kuwabara through the portal, pushes Kurama through, then jumps in-  
  
Kris: -follows with Yusuke and Hiei-  
  
Becky: -lands in attic, on top of Naraku- O___o What happened to him?  
  
Sano: -whistles and looks around innocently-  
  
Kris: -lands, Hiei next to her and Yusuke behind her- ...  
  
Kris: -sees that Sesshoumaru is no where to be found- ....Where's the pretty guy?  
  
Vash: Oh, the guy with the hair? He said something about going to find shampoo.  
  
Inuyasha: He went to "preen" himself in your bathroom...  
  
Kris: ___ Ok then... -glances to Hojo-  
  
Becky: -looks around- Seems as if we have everyone... except for the priest and the one preening...  
  
Kris: -nods-  
  
Becky: Should we assign... sleeping arrangements first? -glances around evilly-  
  
Kris: -cackles- Yes, yes!!  
  
All the guys: NUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!  
  
Becky: Humph... if Miroku was here, he would be happy that this was about to happen...  
  
Kris: Tell me about it... -___-  
  
Inuyasha: Grrr...  
  
Kris: Ok...let's see..  
  
Becky: Well... I have LOTS of floor space in my room... Kukukukuku...  
  
Sesshoumaru: -screams girlishly from the bathroom and runs up into the attic, breathing heavily, his   
  
hair dishelved-  
  
Kurama: -stares menacingly at Sesshoumaru-   
  
Sesshoumaru: From the toilet...dead...clay priestess...  
  
Sesshoumaru: -blinks, then returns the stare-  
  
Inuyasha: -sighs- Figures... Be right back... -goes down into the bathroom-  
  
Becky: -steps between the death stare- No, no, no... Save this until tomorrow...   
  
Kris: -glances between the two glaring bishounens-  
  
Kurama: -points to Sesshoumaru- Me... you... tomorrow... 4 P.M.   
  
Becky: 4 P.M.??  
  
Kurama: I need my beauty sleep...  
  
Sesshoumaru: ...What for? A hair appointment?  
  
Kurama: No... We -makes strange motions with his arms, like he's dancing the Monkey- FIGHT!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: Ooooh!! Ok, I'll take you on!  
  
Sano: -rolls his eyes-  
  
Wolfwood: -returns to the attic- I'm out of cigarettes... anybody got some cash?  
  
Vash: No..  
  
Vash: If I had some, I'd get donuts.  
  
Sano: Nope... I don't even pay my bills... muchless have cash to spend on... did you say donuts?  
  
Vash: -shifty glance- Nope...no donuts here..  
  
Sano: -pulls money out of his pocket- Wanna get some?  
  
Becky: Waaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiit a second... you just said...  
  
Vash: -eyes light up- REALLY?!  
  
Sano: Sure...  
  
Vash: -lundges at Sano and hugs him- Thank you!  
  
Kuwabara: -wakes up and looks around- Hey, Yusuke... where are we?  
  
Yusuke: In these people's attic...they want us to fight in some kind of tournament.  
  
Kuwabara: But... who's going to feed my cats?!   
  
Yusuke: They'll eat each other once they get hungry enough..  
  
Yusuke: Don't worry, you'll have some left by the time you get home.  
  
Kuwabara: -faints again-  
  
Kris: Sleeping arrangements... -watches as Vash takes the money from Sano and goes to find a donut   
  
shop, of which there are none around for quite a few miles-  
  
Becky: Wait guys!! Don't leave until sleeping spots have been assigned to you... or else you sleep on   
  
the... couch!!  
  
Sano: -gasps-  
  
Kris: __ You think we can fit that many on the couch?  
  
Becky: No, it was bait to make them like the arrangements they get...  
  
Kris: Ooooh...well, Vash and Wolfwood aren't going to be happy, because they're not here to get   
  
theirs.  
  
Wolfwood: I'm here... I was looking for more cigarettes...  
  
Kris: Well, that's good...hey, if Vash isn't back, he can share my bed!!  
  
Becky: Ok... I'm going to pick a number between 1 and 1,000,000... anybody who guesses close to   
  
that number gets to sleep in my room...  
  
Becky: -looks at Hiei- You go first...  
  
Kris: Err...maybe you should make that 1 and 20..  
  
Becky: Ok... between 1 and 20...  
  
Hiei: ...9  
  
Becky: Kurama?  
  
Kurama: Umm... 9...  
  
Kris: -snickers-  
  
Becky: No... you can't pick the same number as Hiei...  
  
Kurama: Fine... 10...  
  
Becky: Good... Yusuke?  
  
Yusuke: I don't want to sleep in your room..  
  
Becky: -takes out Jaken's stick- PICK A NUMBER!!  
  
Yusuke: …  
  
Becky: -whacks Yusuke-  
  
Yusuke: OW! -rubs his head- Fine, damn it...11.  
  
Becky: -whacks him again- No cursing!! -looks down at Kuwabara- Somebody pick a number for   
  
him...  
  
Yusuke: 2!  
  
Becky: Thank you...  
  
Becky: -looks around- Naraku... number please...  
  
Naraku: -wakes up- 21...  
  
Becky: -stands over him menacingly- Between 1 and 20...  
  
Naraku: 20...  
  
Becky: Thanks...  
  
Hojo: Can I go next?! Huh?  
  
Becky: -looks at Hojo- No  
  
Hojo: -whines- Whhhhyy?  
  
Becky: Sano... Number...  
  
Becky: -whacks Hojo with Jaken's stick- Shut up!!  
  
Sano: urmm... 15...  
  
Hojo: Ow!! Ok, ok!  
  
Inuyasha: -re-enters attic after fighting off the clay priestess from the toilet-   
  
Becky: Inuyasha... pick a number between 1 and 20...  
  
Kris: -glances at Inuyasha's dirty pink kimono-  
  
Naraku: -stands behind Becky, motioning for Inuyasha to run away-  
  
Becky: -turns around and hits Naraku with Jaken's stick-  
  
Inuyasha: 4  
  
Kris: -watches-  
  
Becky: -looks around- Who hasn't picked a number yet?  
  
Becky: Kenshin!!  
  
Kenshin: o__o;;;  
  
Kenshin: -points to Wolfwood- Neither has he!  
  
Becky: -glares at Kenshin- Number… now…  
  
Kenshin: 1  
  
Wolfwood: Don't even have to ask... 5 1/2...  
  
Becky: Ok... Who's left? -glances past Hojo-  
  
Hojo: -waves his hand in the air- Meeeee!! MEEEEEE!!!!  
  
Hojo: Pick meeeee!!!  
  
Becky: -looks at Hojo- Fine... number?  
  
Hojo: 16!  
  
Becky: Ok... Sesshoumaru... You want to pick a number?  
  
Sesshoumaru: No, I have my own place to sleep..  
  
Becky: -stares at Sesshoumaru- Oh, no... you don't...  
  
Sesshoumaru: Fine...17  
  
Becky: Thank you...  
  
Becky: And somebody needs to pick a number for Vash…  
  
Kris: I said if he's not back, he gets to sleep in MY bed…  
  
Sano: -looks at Becky in fear- What was your number?  
  
Becky: He he he...  
  
Kris: What was it?  
  
Becky: 18!!  
  
Becky: Kukukukukuku...  
  
Sesshoumaru: ....NUUUUUUUUU!!!!  
  
Hojo: Darn!! I wanted a door prize!  
  
Becky: The following were the six people closest to my number... Naraku, Sesshoumaru, Hojo, Sano,   
  
Yusuke, and Kurama.  
  
Becky: Ha ha Yusuke... looks like you'll be in my room after all!!  
  
Yusuke: Damn.  
  
Becky: -smacks Yusuke again-   
  
Yusuke: Arrgh…  
  
Becky: In Kris's room will be Kenshin, Vash, Hiei, Wolfwood, Inuyasha, and Kuwabara.  
  
Kris: KUWABARA?! EWWWWWWWWWW!!  
  
Becky: -cackles- Kukukukukukuku!!  
  
Kris: I don't mind the others, they're all cute, but KUWABARA?!  
  
Becky: Hey... I'm stuck with numskull... -points to Hojo, who is poking Sesshoumaru in the head-  
  
Hojo: -blinks and pokes Sesshoumaru's hair-  
  
Sesshoumaru: -punches Hojo- HOW DARE YOU?!  
  
Kris: Ok...everyone needs to get to bed..  
  
Becky: -grabs Yusuke by the arm and Sesshoumaru by the big furry thing and yanks them to her   
  
room, followed by the others-  
  
Sano: Looks like this is going to be a long night...  
  
Kris: -rubs her hands together, staring at the guys left in front of her- Well, well, well...  
  
Kenshin, Hiei, Wolfwood, and Inuyasha: AHHHHH!!!  
  
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Becky: Well, I think I rather enjoyed writing that part, eh? Another chapter will be on its way soon... no reviews needed. 


	2. Sleepover

disclaimer: Becky and Kris: We own nothing!! -are dragged away by little minions of the Devil- O___o;;   
  
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*And so, everyone went on the their assigned bedrooms...  after all the protesting, yelling, biting, clawing, etc...*  
  
Kris: -is standing on her bed, yelling out things at the guys- WORK, YOU DOGS!    
  
Guys: -look up- O___o;;; -go back to setting out their blankets for bed-   
  
Vash: -prances in with Krispy Kreme donuts- Lookie!!   
  
Kris: o____o;; KRISPY KREME!!!! -tackles him-  
  
Kuwabara:  -cries-  My poor kitties...  poor poor kitties...  
  
Wolfwood:  -messes up his blanket-  
  
Kris: -growls- FIX IT!!  
  
Wolfwood:  Yes master Kris...  
  
Vash: ^___^; Do...you think you could get off of me..?    
  
Kris: Sure.. -hops off of him, taking the donuts-  
  
Vash: NUUUUUUU!!!! ;-;  
  
Kris: Shuddap, you're bunking with me...    
  
Vash: Does that mean I get the top bunk? ^__^  
  
Kris: ...No.     
  
Vash: But no one's up there!!    
  
Kris: -shrugs- So?  
  
Wolfwood and Inuyasha: -stop to watch the arguement in progress-  
  
Vash: I want my own bed!!    
  
Kris: YOU'RE SLEEPING IN MINE!!  
  
Hiei: -watches from his perch in the stuffed animal net-  
  
Inuyasha: -holds out a donut he stole from Vash's bag-  I'll bet you this donut she wins...  
  
Wolfwood: -shakes Inuyasha's hand-  Deal...  
  
Vash: NO!    
  
Kris: YES!    
  
Vash: NO!!    
  
Kris: YES!!!  
  
Kuwabara: -still weeping-  
  
Vash: Fine!!  -hops into the bed-  
  
Inuyasha:  HA!!  -stuffs the donut into his mouth-  
  
Kris: -hops in too-   
  
Vash: ... O__o;   
  
Kris: What?    
  
Vash: I thought that you were going to take the top...    
  
Kris: This is my bed, ne?     
  
Vash: Yeah...    
  
Kris: So I sleep in it!    
  
Vash: -__-;  
  
Kris: -listens to the noises of Kuwabara's weeping and Inuyasha's chewing- ...  
  
*Kris's bedroom door creaks open and Sesshoumaru is found standing in the doorway, Becky behind him*  
  
Becky: -drags Sesshoumaru in by the arm-    
  
Kris: -blinks when she hears a thud, and looks up to see that the net and broken and Hiei had fallen to the ground- Heh..  
  
Becky: O___o  
  
Kris: HEY!!  Careful with the bishie!!  
  
Becky: Take him!!  If he torches one more thing in my room, I'll kill him!!  
  
Kris: YAY!!! -hops up and hugs Sesshoumaru-  
  
Becky: -grabs Wolfwood-  You're in my room now!!       
  
Wolfwood: O___O  NUUUUUUUUU!!  
  
Kris: Good...he kept messing up his blankets.  
  
Becky: -drags him out, slamming the door-  
  
Kris: Ok, Fluffy-chan, you sleep where Wolfwood was!    
  
Sesshoumaru: ...But it smells like smoke.  
  
Kris: -growls-  I said, SLEEP THERE!!    
  
Sesshoumaru: Ok, ok... -goes and lays down-  
  
Hiei: -is unconscious-  
  
Inuyasha:  -sticks out his tounge at Sesshoumaru-  I just had a donut... and you didn't get one!!  
  
Kuwabara:  I want my friends... and my...  -screams in a girly voice-  KITTIES!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: Silence, half-breed!  I will beat you into the ground and take the Tetususaiga tomorrow, then I will terrorize the people of this time into giving me their donuts until I can build a fortress with them!!  BWAHAHAHA!!  
  
Inuyasha:  Yeah, right.  They made up one of those fighting web things and you don't face me first tomorrow.  You face him...  -points to Hiei-  
  
Inuyasha: So, HA!!  
  
Kris: NOOO!! This is a battle royal!!  You face each other ALL at the same time!  
  
Inuyasha:  But the priest said...    
  
Kris: THE PRIEST IS MISINFORMED!!  
  
Inuyasha:  Damn priest...  he's just like the monk...  liars...  
  
Kris: Tell me about it..  
  
Hiei: -comes to- Shut up, you stupid oaf!! -glares at Kuwabara-  
  
Kenshin: -has been alseep for the whole time, leaning against the wall-  
  
*In Becky's room*  
  
Becky: Lights out in ten minutes!       
  
Naraku:  Wait...  Do you happen to have a night light?  I have a slight fear of the dark...  
  
Hojo: Me too!!  
  
Yusuke: -is sitting in the corner, against the wall- Wimps..  
  
Wolfwood:  Why did that Sesshoumaru guy have to torch her stuff?    
  
Yusuke: I dunno..  
  
Sano: -lays across Becky's bed-    
  
Becky: -cackles-  Kukukukuku...  
  
Yusuke: -glares at Sano- Only gets to sleep on the bed 'cause he's the favorite...  
  
Becky: -looks back at Yusuke-  Would you rather SHARE the bed with me?  
  
Yusuke: -makes a face- No.  
  
Becky: -pulls out extra, fold away bed thing-  You guys can fight over this if you want...  
  
Hojo: I want it!! -lays on it-  
  
Kurama:  -takes out the rose whip-  I don't think so kid...  
  
Kurama: -knocks Hojo off the extra bed and claim it as his own-  
  
Hojo: ;-;  
  
Becky: Now this is what I wanna see...  
  
Hojo: -curls up on the carpet-  No one can take this from me...  
  
Yusuke: -snorts- I think they can...  
  
Naraku: -picks up Hojo and tosses him out the door, closing and locking it behind him-  I've been waiting to do that since I got in here...  
  
Becky:  Joy!!  He's gone!  
  
Hojo: -shivers and sniffles-   
  
Yusuke: -smirks- Well...I'm going to sleep...   
  
Kurama: Yusuke... please don't go to sleep and leave me to fend for myself against these freaks...  
  
Kurama: They're worse than Kuwabara with his cats...  
  
Becky: -shivers at the thought of Kuwabara's house-  
  
Yusuke: Do them or something...isn't that what a Youko does best?  
  
Yusuke: I'm sure they'd leave you alone after that..  
  
Becky:  O___o     You could do me any time baby!!   -makes obscene motions at   
  
Kurama-  
  
Kurama: -sighs-  
  
Yusuke: o__o;; I'm...going to sleep now.. -bows his head as he tries to go to sleep-  
  
Becky:  -walks over to Yusuke and leans by his ear-  You'll have nightmares about those remarks...  he he he...  
  
Wolfwood:  I think all of us will...  
  
Sano:  Hey, at least you don't have to sleep with her...  
  
Yusuke: -is alseep-  
  
Yusuke: -snore-  
  
Naraku:  -peeks out the door and realizes Hojo is nowhere to be seen-  
  
Naraku: I think he's been eaten by wolves...  
  
Becky: There are no wolves around here you moron...  
  
*back in Kris's room...*  
  
::Everyone is asleep, Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, and Kuwabara on the floor, Kenshin   
  
against the wall, Vash and Kris in her bed, and Hiei burried in a large pile of stuffed   
  
animals::  
  
Vash: -hears something scratching at the window- ... -opens and eye- What's that?  
  
Kris: -rolls over, drooling on his arm-  
  
Vash: -pokes Kris- Hey...they're something by the window..  
  
Kris: Mmm...what?  
  
Kuwabara:  -begins to roll back and forth, having a nightmare-  KITTIES!!!  NO, NOT THE KITTIES!!  
  
Vash: -pushes the curtain aside to see a horrible creature trying to open the window- o___o;; AHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
  
Kris: -sits up and looks at the window- Darn it, Hojo!!  GO AWAY!!  
  
Vash: -has passed out-  
  
Kris: .__. Oh well..  
  
Kuwabara: -continues to yell-  DON'T HURT THE KITTIES!!  TAKE ME INSTEAD!!  
  
Kris: -whacks the window, making Hojo fall from the side of the house-  
  
Kris: -grabs Vash's glasses and throws them at Kuwabara's head- SHUDDAP!  
  
Kuwabara: -wakes up in a cold sweat-  How'd I get her?  
  
Kris:  ...I killed the kitties.  
  
Kuwabara:  NUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!  -faints-  
  
Kris: Finally....sleep. -rolls over and is about to fall asleep, when the pile of stuffed animals shudders- o___o  
  
Hiei: -pokes his head out- ...What?  
  
Kris: ARRRGGH!!! GO TO SLEEP! -burries face in pillow-    
  
Hiei: ...I'm thirsty... -goes to get something to drink-  
  
Hiei: -steps on Inuyasha on his way out-  
  
*Kris's door opens and Naraku runs in and slams the door behind himself*  
  
Hiei: -pushes past Naraku- Stupid monkey...  
  
Naraku:  Don't go out there... its dark!!  
  
Hiei: -walks out and goes to the kitchen-  
  
Naraku: Kris...  can I stay in here?  
  
Kris: -screams- WHY??  I'M TRYING TO SLEEEEEEEEEEP!!  
  
Naraku: I had a nightmare about Becky and Kurama doing... IT... and I can't sleep...  
  
Kris: o__o;; Oh..you poor thing.  Ok.  
  
Naraku: Thank you...  -goes and sits in the corner, rocking back and forth-  They won't find me here... they won't find me here...  
  
Inuyasha: -groggily looks up to see who's talking-  Naraku...  what's your problem?  
  
::random glass-shattering noises and crashes come from the kitchen::  
  
Hiei: -walks back in with a glass of water- Damn "fridge"...  
  
Hiei: Had to blow the whole thing up to get some water..  
  
*Becky runs in, baseball bat in hand*     
  
Becky:  What was that?!  And what are you doing in here Naraku?  
  
Hiei: -holds up glass of water- I was thirsty...  
  
Naraku: -screams like a little girl at the sight of Becky and covers his eyes-  
  
Kenshin:  -is still asleep, even after all of the screaming, noises, and such things-  
  
Becky: -smiles and says in a sing-song voice-  Somebody had a nightmare... about me and Kurama....  he he he he...  
  
Hiei: -drinks water and smashes glass, leaving the broken pieces on the floor, then curls back up amongst the stuffed animals- ((A/N: Kris: AWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!))    
  
*Kris's door opens once more and Kurama enters*   
  
Kurama: -looks at Becky-  So, here's where you went...  
  
Becky: Yeah...  were you looking for me?  
  
Kurama: -smiles knowingly at Becky-  You know why I was looking for you...  
  
Naraku: -screams again-  NUUUUUUUUUU!!  MENTAL PICTURES!!  MENTAL PICTURES!!  
  
Hiei: -lifts his head- o____o;;; -screams- MY EARS!!!  I'M CORRUPT FOR LIFE!!  TAINTED!!!  
  
*Becky and Kurama leave Kris's room together, whispering obscene things in each other's ears*  
  
Hiei: -is shuddering violently-  
  
*Back in Becky's room*    
  
*Yusuke, Wolfwood, and Sano sit against the wall farthest from the bed, staring.  All are wide awake*   
  
Sano:  Think they went to sleep?  
  
Yusuke: Hopefully...  
  
Wolfwood:  I don't know, but I'm not going to check...  
  
Yusuke: Neither am I...rooster-head, you go! -pokes Sano-  
  
Sano: NO WAY!!  He's your friend, Yusuke, you go check...  
  
Yusuke: -grumbles and stands up-  
  
Yusuke: -approaches the bed- ... -peers at the lumps under the covers-  
  
Becky: -jumps up, scaring Yusuke-  Bwahahahahaha!!  
  
Sano:  God... still awake...  
  
Yusuke: -screams and runs for the wall-  
  
Kurama: -looks over- We aren't asleep yet...    
  
Becky: And we could hear eveything you guys were saying...  
  
Yusuke: -huddled in the coner- Go to sleep already!!  
  
Yusuke: We have to FIGHT tomorrow, you know!  
  
Becky and Kurama:  -cackle evilly-  
  
Kurama:  I DO need some sleep.  I have to face that guy who thinks he's prettier than me tomorrow...  
  
Yusuke: -makes a face- He IS prettier than you..  
  
Becky:  -purrs into Kurama's ear-  No one's as pretty as you...  
  
Yusuke: Ok, I'm going into the other room...any more of this and I'll die..you guys can feel free to join me. -stands up and walks out-  
  
Becky: -throws the "little prayer rock"(a strange rock with eyes that she got from some freak at church) at Yusuke-  
  
Yusuke: -is hit in the back of the head with it- Ow!!  Stupid... -walks out, mumbling-  
  
Sano and Wolfwood: -stand and walk out also-  
  
Becky:  Good... now we can sleep...  Move back to your bed.  
  
Kurama:  YES!!  
  
*back in Kris's room*  
  
Yusuke: -walks into Kris's room and lays down on the floor-  
  
::everyone is once again asleep::   
  
Kenshin: -snores loudly-  
  
Wolfwood and Sano: -also walk in-  
  
Sano:  Kenshin always could sleep through anything... except...  -makes strange noise with his feet, causing Kenshin to wake up-  Heh... gets him every time...  
  
Kenshin: AHHHH!! The noise!! THE NOISE!!  
  
Sano: -laughs and lays down on the floor-  
  
Kenshin: -puts his hands over his ears, whimpering-  
  
Kenshin: -slowly falls back to sleep- ... -snores-  
  
Wolfwood: -falls asleep leaning against the wall-  
  
*And so the group has finally gone to sleep...  everyone, except Becky and Kurama, in Kris's room.  With the Battle Royal tomorrow, who will be able to win with the major loss of sleep?  And what has become of Hojo?*  
  
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Next part will be the last part... the actual battle... fun fun fun.... check for more soon!! 


	3. Donuts and other fun

Disclaimer: We still own nothing!! No matter how much our little hearts desire....   
  
Please somebody review!!   
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
*The next day eventually rolls around, to all the guys dismay. Becky and Kris wake up at the crack of dawn to make sure things are ready for the Battle.*  
  
Kris: ...Should we give them breakfast? -is sitting at the kitchen table, eating one of Vash's donuts-  
  
Becky: -plops down next to Kris- I guess we should. Hey, what ever happened to Hojo?  
  
Hojo: -comes out from under the couch-  
  
Becky: -looks at Hojo- Had a good sleep?  
  
Hojo: -whimpers- No...  
  
Becky: TOO BAD!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
Hojo: ;-; Meanie....I'm hungry..  
  
Becky: -looks around the kitchen- Anything you can find, you can eat...  
  
Kris: Well, there's not much good stuff to eat...Hiei DID blow up the fridge..  
  
Wolfwood: -walks into the kitchen-  
  
Becky: -looks up- Morning!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: -walks out of the bathroom-  
  
Kris: O___o; When'd you go in there?  
  
Becky: -glares at Sesshoumaru- Took you long enough...  
  
Sesshoumaru: Two hours ago...gotta look pretty for a fight.  
  
Becky and Wolfwood: -make a run for the bathroom-  
  
Wolfwood: -gets there first and slams the door in Becky's face-  
  
Kris: -watches- Heh..  
  
Becky: -bangs on the bathroom door- LET ME IN THERE NOW!!  
  
Kurama: -steps into the hallway, sees what's going on, and returns to the bedroom-  
  
Yusuke: -walks out of the room- Geez...you people are loud..  
  
Becky: -turns to glare at Yusuke- Don't get me started...  
  
Yusuke: -shrugs and walks into the kitchen-  
  
Hojo: -is digging through the cabinet-   
  
Becky: Grrr... -returns to banging on the bathroom door-  
  
Kuwabara: -enters kitchen- *sniffle* -looks at Kris- YOU KILLED MY KITTIES!!!  
  
Kris: -makes a face and glances at Yusuke- Not the sharpest knife in the drawer, is he?   
  
Yusuke: Nah, he's the spoon...  
  
Kuwabara: -runs at Kris- AHHHHHHHHH!!!  
  
Kris: -___- -pulls Hojo in front of her-   
  
Hojo: AHHH!!  
  
Sano: -walks into the kitchen, hugging Becky's teddy bear- What's going on in here?  
  
Kuwabara: -slugs Hojo in blind rage-  
  
Yusuke: All hell is breaking loose..  
  
Hojo: x__x   
  
Kris: -pats Hojo's head- Good human shield!! ^___^  
  
Sano: Think I'll just go back to bed... -returns to Kris's room-  
  
Hiei: -walks into the kitchen, shooting a death glare at the ruined fridge-  
  
Hojo: -is unconscious on the floor-  
  
Inuyasha: -walks cautiously into the kitchen-  
  
Inuyasha: -spots Hojo on the floor- HA! What happened to Hobo?  
  
Kris: __ Kuwabara slugged him...  
  
Kuwabara: -is standing far from the table, breathing heavily- You... killed... the... kitties...  
  
Kris: No, Hiei did...I just covered for him.  
  
Yusuke: -shrugs-  
  
Hiei: -glares-  
  
Kuwabara: -turns to Hiei- You killed them, shrimp?  
  
Hiei: No, you fool...Kurama did.  
  
Becky: -reenters the kitchen-   
  
Kurama: -enters the kitchen upon hearing his name- What did I do?  
  
Kuwabara: -runs at Kurama-  
  
Hiei: You killed Kuwabara's kittens..  
  
Becky: -picks up frying ran and hits Kuwabara in the head, rendering him unconscious-  
  
Kris: -eats another donut-   
  
Vash: -walks out of the room- Do I smell....DONUTS?!  
  
Kris: o___o; -hides the donuts under the table- No.  
  
Vash: -walks over to the table and spots Hojo on the floor- Hey...it's the window monster!!  
  
Vash: -carefully steps over Hojo and sniffs around the table- Donuts...where are you?  
  
Becky: -shakes her head sadly- I'm going to wake everyone else up...  
  
Kris: Ok...  
  
Becky: -walks into Kris's room to find Naraku and Kenshin sleeping against the wall and Sano curled up in the middle of the floor clutching her teddy bear-  
  
Becky: WAKE UP!!  
  
Kenshin: -wakes up- AHHH!! Ok!!  
  
Naraku: -wakes up and looks at Becky- Oh, no... not you... -cringes-  
  
Becky: -looks down at Sano- MY TEDDY BEAR!!  
  
Sano: -looks up innocently- Mine now...  
  
Becky: Argh!! -attacks Sano for the bear-  
  
Kenshin: -stands up and yawns, then heads for the kitchen-  
  
Naraku: -yells after Kenshin- Wait for meeeee!!!  
  
Naraku: -runs after Kenshin-  
  
Becky and Sano: -roll around on the floor, wrestling for the bear-  
  
*Back in the kitchen*  
  
Kenshin: ...I'm hungry.  
  
Kurama: Join the group...  
  
Vash: -has taken the donuts and is in the corner, eating them-  
  
Kris: ....MY DONUTS!! -attacks Vash-  
  
Becky: -enters the kitchen, hair messed up, clutching her teddy bear victoriously-   
  
Sano: -follows in, a look of defeat upon his face-  
  
Inuyasha: Hey!! Give me one of those donuts!!  
  
Inuyasha: -joins Kris in attacking Vash-  
  
Kris: -looks up, while biting on Vash's hair- NO! MINE!!  
  
Inuyasha: -growls- MINE!!!  
  
Kris: -lets go on the unconscious Vash and jumps on Inuyasha- MIIIIINNEEEE!!  
  
Inuyasha: -grabs the donuts and attempts to get away- NOOOOOOO!!  
  
Kris: -grabs his pink kimono-  
  
Inuyasha: -hands over the donuts- No, I give!! Just don't mess up my kimono!!  
  
Kris: -takes them and beats him over the head with the bag- And don't ever touch them again!  
  
Becky: -looks at the time- Hey!! We should begin soon...  
  
Kurama: -glares at Sesshoumaru- Let's get it on!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: Ok, pretty boy! -shakes a fist- You're going down!  
  
Kurama: -runs at Sesshoumaru, girly slapping him-  
  
Sesshoumaru: -girly slaps back at Kurama-   
  
Kris: .__. Er...  
  
Becky: O___O Heh...   
  
Sesshoumaru: DIE!!! -slaps at Kurama-  
  
Kurama: -begins tirade of girly slaps-  
  
Kurama: NO, YOU!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: YOU!! -slaps-  
  
Kurama: YOU!! -slaps back-  
  
Becky: -sits down- Wow... this could take a while...  
  
Sesshoumaru: YOU KNOW I'M PRETTIER!! I have a whole end theme with just ME!!  
  
Kurama: -slaps again- How dare YOU!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: -slaps Kurama- It's true!  
  
Kurama: -slaps Sesshoumaru- No... I'll never admit to it!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: Fine then!! Just keep lying to yourself!! -slaps-  
  
Becky: -stands up and steps between them- STOP IT NOW!!   
  
Sesshoumaru: -pouts- But he thinks he's prettier than me!!  
  
Kurama: -stops his hand in mid-slap, preventing himself from hitting Becky-  
  
Kurama: -points to Becky- She agrees with me!!  
  
Becky: Heh...  
  
Sesshoumaru: Of course she does! She's ugly!  
  
Becky: -turns around and slaps Sesshoumaru- SHUT UP!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: YOU!!  
  
Becky: YOU!!!  
  
Sano: -steps forward- No, all of you are wrong. The prettiest person here is... Hojo. -points to figure on the ground-  
  
Kurama: O___O  
  
Kris: -grabs strait jacket- C'mere Sano...  
  
Sano: Noooo!! -turns to run-  
  
Kris: -grabs Sano and forces him into the jacket-  
  
Becky: -grabs the jacketed Sano and drags him to her room- Mine now...he he he...  
  
Sesshoumaru: Well, that was interesting. I think I'll go preen myself for the fight. -goes to the bathroom and knocks on the door-  
  
Wolfwood: -yells through the door- Who is it?  
  
Sesshoumaru: I, Sesshoumaru, request entrance to this hygenial facility!  
  
Wolfwood: -through door- What?  
  
Sesshoumaru: ...I need to pee.  
  
Wolfwood: -opens door- Ok. I just didn't want to give the bathroom to Becky... -walks into kitchen-  
  
Sesshoumaru: -goes into the bathroom-  
  
Vash: -wakes up- ...Donuts? Where are you?  
  
Kris: ...in my belly.  
  
Vash: NOOOOO!!  
  
Kris: -cackles and pats tummy-   
  
Becky: -returns to the kitchen holding Jaken's stick and grinning- Guess what guys...  
  
Inuyasha: I know I shouldn't ask but... what?  
  
Becky: -holds up Jaken's stick- I learned how to use it!  
  
Sano: -runs in- O___O She can shoot fire with that thing! RUN!!  
  
Becky: -cackles and shoots fire from the stick, igniting the still unconscious Hojo's hair- BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
Sano: -runs back to the bedroom to hide-  
  
Hojo: X____X -hair is on fire-  
  
Kenshin: -blinks and pours his glass of orange juice on Hojo's head, putting out the flames-  
  
Hojo: -hair is black and crispy-  
  
Becky: -whacks Kenshin with the stick- You ruined my fun!  
  
Kenshin: @___@  
  
Kris: Don't you think we should start this battle thing soon?  
  
Becky: Yeah. I think we should start. I wanna see some slaughter! -waves Jaken's stick in the air, igniting random things in the kitchen-  
  
Yusuke: o___o; -chair next to him catches fire-  
  
Kris: Err... let's go get everyone.  
  
*Nearly everybody walks out to the backyard, where Kris and Becky had constructed a "ring." It was actually just a large platform made from paper mache, but we can imagine.*  
  
Kris: -drags Hojo out next to the ring- Crispy hair... -pokes his hair, causing half of it to fall out-  
  
Inuyasha: -looks at Hojo- Can't wait 'til he wakes up. That'll make for some real comedy...  
  
Becky: -swings Jaken's stick, igniting the ring and burning it to the ground- Oh, well. The giant circle burned into the ground can serve as the ring now...   
  
Kurama: -looks around- Where'd Sesshoumaru go? I must prove I am better than him in some way... even if it isn't being prettier.  
  
Kris: -looks up from her spot in front of Hojo- He was preening in the bathroom last time I saw him...  
  
Sano: -hops out of the house, his feet tied together- Argh!! -falls on his face-  
  
Becky: Heh... wait. Who tied your feet?  
  
Naraku: -exits the house, eyes gleaming- Kukukukukuku...  
  
Sesshoumaru: -walks out after them, tossing his hair over his shoulder-  
  
Kurama: -walks calmly up to Sesshoumaru- I think this can only be settled in one way.   
  
Sesshoumaru: And what was is that?  
  
Kurama: Braid warfare!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: You're on!  
  
*Both begin to braid each other's hair fiercely*  
  
Kris: Let's get this thing started, shall we?  
  
*Everyone excluding Kurama, Sesshoumaru, Sano, Kenshin, Vash, and Hojo, enters the ring-  
  
Kris: -grabs microphone and begins to shout into it, though everyone can hear her fine without it- Ok, no rules and the last person standing in the ring is the winner! Once you're knocked out or step out of the ring, you're out of the fight! Begin!  
  
*Everyone in the ring stands still, looking around*  
  
Kris: I said BEGIN!!  
  
*The fighters all attack each other at once*  
  
Hojo: -groans and sits up- Hey... what's happening? -stands up and walks into the ring- Did the fight start all ready? -blinks and is suddenly mobbed by the fighters-  
  
Kris: -smirks and hands Becky popcorn- Now this is entertainment.  
  
Vash: -walks over with Kenshin- Couldn't you find a less violent form of entertainment?  
  
Kris: -coughs and hands Vash a donut-  
  
Vash: -grins- Wow, this sure is an interesting fight!!  
  
*Back at the braid war.*  
  
Kurama: -holds up the braid he made in Sesshoumaru's hair- Look! Mine has ribbons AND beads!!  
  
Sesshoumaru: -holds up the braid in Kurama's hair- Mine has feathers and DAISIES!!  
  
Kurama and Sesshoumaru: -turn to Sano- Which looks better?  
  
Sano: They're both nice but... -looks at the half bald Hojo- Hojo's is the best.  
  
*Kurama and Sesshoumaru proceed to beat Sano senseless.*  
  
Becky: -eats popcorn- I don't know which fight I would rather watch. -looks back and forth between the Hojo bashing and the Sano bashing- Oh, well!  
  
Hojo: -lays in the ground, the rest of his hair gone, unconscious-  
  
Kris: -yawns and throws a donut into the ring-  
  
*At that exact moment, Hiei released the Dragon of the Darkness Flame, sending everyone running out of the ring.*  
  
Vash: DONUT!! -runs into the ring and picks it up and nibbles on it-  
  
Hiei: -passes out-  
  
Kris: -blinks and grabs the microphone, yelling into it- Well, by some strange happening, Vash is the only one left standing in the ring, which makes him the winner!  
  
Vash: -runs up to Kris- Waddidiwin??  
  
Kris: -holds up a belt made of aluminum foil that has a donut in the center of it- This!  
  
Vash: -stares at the belt- Why does the donut have a bite in it?  
  
Kris: ...that's the way it came...  
  
Vash: Ok! -yanks the belt out of Kris's hand and puts it on-   
  
*Sesshoumaru and Kurama walk over, discussing hair styles and accessories.*  
  
Becky: So, you guys made up?  
  
Sesshoumaru: No. We've decided that we will train in the arts of hair care and styling for a year then we will have a rematch to finally decide who is the ... (uses a deep, echo-y voice) HAIR MASTER!  
  
Becky: O___O ... whatever.  
  
Kris: -looks from the ecstatic Vash to the unconscious Hiei, Hojo, and Sano- Well, I think you guys deserve to go home now...  
  
*Everyone heads inside, some carrying unconscious bodies with them.*  
  
*In the attic, much later*  
  
Becky: So, you guys ready t go home?  
  
Guys: YES!!  
  
Kris: Sheesh... we get it. -begins to punch in numbers on the time portal's convenient little keypad- But don't be surprised if we come back and get you... for other purposes...  
  
*The guys get freaked out by Kris's last statement and run for the portal. As Vash gets close, Kris grabs him and hugs him.*  
  
Kris: -hands Vash the purple fork- They may need this...  
  
Vash: -takes the fork- Thanks. Oh, and thanks for the awesome belt. -pats belt-  
  
Kris: You're welc... wait, didn't it only have one bite before?  
  
Vash: -grins and looks down at the donut, which now had a bite on either side- Maybe...  
  
*Before Kris could question it any more, Vash jumped through the portal as well, leaving the two girls alone in the attic.*  
  
Becky: -looks at the keypad- Hey... did you just send them to 1966?  
  
Kris: -glances back at the keypad- Oops... looks like I did. -long pause- Well, wanna get some donuts?  
  
Becky: Sure...  
  
*Both girls leave the attic and head for Krispy Kreme.*  
  
!!FIN!!  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Kris: -__- I wanted it to say "Owari", but nooooo, Becky had to put "Fin".. 


End file.
